I have a shiny new jar.

Every new year is a special event. It's like getting an empty jar that you have to fill with new memories, laughter, tears, and all the other things that come in between. But filling up this jar is no easy task. You have to work hard for it, careful not to spill whatever you have already put in. I have read somewhere that this 2012, people should start living like the world is truly ending. Dare to do, say, pursue, and ditch things. Leave the regrets for later.


So for this year, I won't write a resolution. Instead, I will list down the treasures that I want to put inside my shiny new jar.

1. Few pieces of coins. I'm starting to save up this year. I think it's about time I stop wasting money on unimportant stuff. 
2. Sprinkles of sand and sunshine. I want to beach hunt more this year. Visayas area please. Beaches!!!
3. A pouch of laughter. Laughing keeps people young. I wanna laugh more this year. 2012's only rule: The louder the laugh, the better.
4. Threads and buttons. The hunt for good-fitting clothes will start this year. 
5. A trickle of sweat. Disgusting right? No. I want to start exercising this year. GOD I'M SERIOUS.
6. Tight little hugs. Everyone wants to be hugged right? More hugs this year!
7. A vial of adrenaline. I have always wanted to bungee jump. I will try to bungee jump this year. Or something crazier. Something that will make my heart pound faster and make me shit scared.
8. A shot of vodka. Will make it a point to connect with old and long-lost friends.Over alcohol, of course! Cheers!
9. Drops of tears. This is gonna be a great year, I can feel it. If ever I'm going to shed some, I'll make sure it's out of happiness.
10. Dusts of make-up. It's the year to be girly and to be a bit more feminine. Less cussing please. Lol I can do this.
11. Torn concert tickets. I promise to attend a concert this year. Alone or with someone, I will watch and sing my lungs out.

These are the stuff that I can think of right now. Will probably update this but I don't really want to over promise anything. I don't want my jar to overflow. 

PS. It's time to fill your jar too. 

2011

This is my attempt to sum up the amazing/crazy year that will leave us in a few hours. 2011 has been a year of concert songs, epic books, unforgettable encounters and endless roads. I did a little traveling, met interesting people and became a sucker for a lot of stuff. 

I went to a couple of destinations this year. It started with a trip to Pangasinan followed by a trip to La Union. Visited Quezon three times --two beach trips and the Pahiyas. I promised myself that I will go somewhere every month. It didn't happen. When the second half of the year came, the lazy bug got me and kept me at home. Went to Cebu last October though. I love going to places. If I have gazillions of moolah, I'll travel around the world .

Watched two major concerts this year. Deftones in February and Incubus last July. Held Chino Moreno's hand. Screamed so hard I was sick the next day. Kissed and hugged Brandon Boyd. FUCKING AMAZING. I think I became friends with karma this year. They say karma's a bitch. Well this bitch got my back. Unbelievable. Unfuckingbelievable.

Celebrations. Two of my college best friends gave birth. MC has Max now and Melo has Venice. I missed both christenings. I am the worst godmother ever. Lace got married too. Missed the wedding. I am the worst friend ever.

I turned 23 last August. I felt free not old.

Started obsessing over Game of Thrones, Big Bang Theory and Fringe.

In 2011, I became a little bit fearless. Completed that Cebu's Skywalk Extreme and watched a concert alone for the first time. I was alone but I enjoyed it.

In a couple of hours, I'm going to welcome 2012 by myself. Well not exactly because I have my cat with me. For the past 22 years, I have been celebrating New Year with my family. This will be the first time that I will greet another chapter of my life without them by my side. It's new. It's brave. And I'm going to make the most out of it. 

Embracing the coming year with more love, more positive energy and more passion. Cheers 2012!!!


THANK YOU 2011. IT WAS MAGICAL.

Pangasinan

La Union

Cebu

Quezon

Lola Nessie and Lolo Nardo's 50th Anniversary

Quezon with Mavericks

Cagbalete, Quezon

Deftones Live in Manila

Wedding in Laguna

March 2011

May 2011

Cebu with my best friends.

There's a concert inside my head.

I'm a big music fan. Although I have this not-so-unusual propensity to rock music, I also enjoy listening to other genres and discovering new bands. Back in college, I used to rely on Imeem, Purevolume and MySpace for new stuff. During those times, I was already listening to CSS and NYPC and Architecture in Helsinki and it's a shame that they're only getting credit now. Sad that those three websites have met their fate, death (I think). Yeah, even the Internet grows up. And life continues to suck. 


Being the big music fan that I am, I often wonder how other people rate their most favorite songs. With various websites coming up with the "best of 2011" or bloggers with "the best fucking songs in the entire universe". I mean there are bajillions of awesome songs out there and bajillions of more songs to be written. How do you freakin' pick the big "Top 10"?


Yes, I have a "karaoke list", those cheesy songs I sing when I wanna belt it all out. There are also those I listen to when I'm happy, sad, giddy, angry, etc. I can't count how many songs have, for lack of a better term, changed/affected my life. A lot, I guess.


Life has its phases and for me, each phase has a particular song, heck, even a particular smell. 2011 has been a Deftones and Incubus concert in my head. Full of Sextape and Royal and Promises Promises and The Original. Probably because I've seen both bands this year. Both events were intensely memorable too.

The best photo I took during their concert here.

During Saturday nights like this, I like listening to Deftones. I don't know, there's comfort in Chino Moreno's voice. On weekday mornings, I shuffle my iPod like crazy. Skipping from song to song, desperately finding that particular track that will lighten the mood, make the weather finer or the traffic less annoying. Metric's Stadium Love is that song. It's the same process when I'm on my way home. Skip. Skip. Listen a little bit. Skip. I won't make a good DJ.


When I feel like partying inside my head, I listen to Andrew WK's Party Hard. When I'm pissed, I listen to Rage Against the Machine, full blast. When I'm sad, I don't listen to music.


When I think of summer and the beach, listening to Weezer's Island In The Sun (yes dammit it's such a cliche) does the trick. When I want to zone out, I listen to School of Seven Bells. When I wanna feel kilig, I listen to Super Furry Animals' Hello Sunshine because it reminds me of Seth Cohen/Adam Brody. Imagine saying hello to sunshine with that dude by your side. Pregnant.


When I'm feeling particularly girly, I listen to She & Him's In The Sun. When I'm feeling funky, I listen to Pedicab. When I'm feeling weird, I listen to Mew. When I'm feeling beautiful, I listen to fucking Suede. When I wanna feel like a real badass, I listen to Lamb of God. When I feel like being an indie kid, I listen to The Vaccines or The Pains Of Being Pure At Heart. When I'm feeling vintage I listen to The Smiths. And when I want to feel really really good, I listen to The Police.


So many songs and musicians. So many feelings. I can't choose a top 10 or 20 or 100. There's a song for every moment. There's a soundtrack for every event. And the events that you remember, shitty or great, they become your favorite along with the songs that softly play in the background.

Cebu 2011

Almost forgot to post about this. Heeh. I went to Cebu with my two best friends, Valerie and Tiffany, together with Francis, Val's boyfriend, and the mother-son tandem of Ate Sha and Lee last October. It was kinda unplanned but the trip turned out to be unforgettable.We only spent two days there. Yes, too little time to do anything but we managed to squeeze in lots of activities.

Proof that we had fun:

On daydreaming.

I daydream a lot. Maybe because I'm lazy. Lazy people daydream a lot. I like imagining myself working somewhere far or lounging somewhere sunny and cool. Is it because I live a boring life? Maybe. On ordinary days, I wake up early, take a hot bath, rummage my closet for clothes, dry my hair, and ride public transport where I rudely peek at other people's mp3 players. I judge people by the music they listen to. After getting in the office, I check my email first and read online articles for about an hour or depends on how the world got more interesting in a span of one night. After finishing what I have to do for the day, I quietly zone out and start thinking of ways on how I WANT to live my life.


I imagine myself to be a travel writer, hopping from country to country, meeting various people and learning different cultures. I want to write about how truly beautiful the chateaus in France are, how handsome the men in Spain are or how magical the Greek islands are. A bit romantic, yes?


I like to think myself as a waitress in a quaint cafe in New York, serving busy businessmen, old couples, artists and even controversial celebrities. I will pour them coffee and serve them their favorite bagel. I will quietly listen to their stories, feel sorry for them or happy for them, depends on their story, really. I will be friends with the kitchen crew and drink vodka with them when the weather becomes too cold.


Obviously, I think and imagine a lot. It's actually healthy.


My mantra in life is this: Thoughts become things. If you imagine it hard, it can come true.

Meeeyn.

I may not be a hardcore chick, kikay stuff and all but I love crushing on dudes. Back when I was younger, I have a weekly crush, usually a school mate or some random dude I saw at some random place. I can go as far as stalking the said person, asking friends' friends for info because back then, Mark Zuckerberg was still working on his brainchild now called Facebook.

I remember crushing on this gasoline boy. Yes, really cute.

My biggest crushes are Hollywood stars and celebrities -- yes, people I won't ever meet. *cough* Brandon Boyd *cough* oh yeah I met him but no, he's not really "Hollywood". Heeh.

Here's a list of people I that I think I will marry someday. Lols.

George Clooney - I've been in love with this man since I was a kid, even my mother knows it. I don't know where I first saw him but I think he is my first celebrity crush. I'm gonna marry this man someday.

Al Pacino - There's something about this old guy that makes me attracted to him. I was in college when I saw his Godfather films and I was smitten. He's a small  guy with a serious knack at acting. He also starred in probably three of the greatest films ever. Tell me, who could freakin beat that?

Brandon Boyd - Beat my adoration for Al Pacino? This guy beats every single man in the world. Ahhh where do I start? I promised myself that I won't clutter this blog with Brandon Boyd stuff. Uhm, yeah. I love this guy so much. So so much.

So much.

So much. Okay, sorry.

Caleb Followill - This guy has serious singing talent and a very pretty face. Ugh the mess and scruff. Southern and gruff and hot. Caleb Followill is married to a Victoria's Secret angel. Brb, crying.

Oguri Shun - This Japanese demi-god is so cute plus his smile is such a killer. Saw him in the action film Azumi. He's the sole reason why I watched the Jap series Hana Yori Dango. Okay, I admit, the story was cute, too.

Noel Gallagher - Yes, he's a dick but who cares, he's cute. Besides, I'm not listing the nicest dudes I know. I'm enumerating the dudes who I think are the uhm sex.  He may be a bastard wrapped in a really nice packaging but he's also talented and has a Brit accent. I'm not much of a good boy chaser as well hence the Gallagher pick. So there.

I can't believe Noel got my longest description.

Anderson Cooper - Ooh Silverfox. He's smart and came from a prominent family (the  Vanderbilts). No, the gay issue won't stop me.

Max Hodges - If you're not a fan of Hollywood gossip and TMZ, then you're probably not familiar with this guy. He's that cute blond surfer dude Harvey Levin and the rest of the reporters often make fun of. I had to Google "TMZ surfer dude" because I didn't know his name. Heh.

No obscure musician or artist here. Bunch of phonies and pussies. 

This entry is brimming with kababawan. Sue me.

July 28, 2011 aka THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE (Incubus Live in Manila)

In my bucketlist, "Meet Brandon Boyd in person." has always been included. I don't know how it'll happen but I have always believed that it will. 

When I heard that Incubus will once again visit the Philippines, I was ecstatic. I have blogged earlier that I wasn't able to watch their two previous concerts here. I told myself that I have no excuse to not watch their third one. I checked the ticket prices and was disappointed to see that the patron seats were too pricey. I paid P5k for the Deftones concert and I was at the area nearest to the stage, able to hold Chino Moreno's hand at one point. But for almost P7k, I won't gamble that much money for a seat/spot, knowing that the band doesn't really interact with the crowd. From the YouTube videos that I have watched over the years, I haven't seen Brandon hold a fan's hand or go near the crowd while performing on stage.

June came and I decided to buy the P3k ticket. Upper Box A, not bad. I gave up the idea of watching them from the moshpit and was telling myself the whole time that fans in that area might see them but they won't be able to talk to them, something that lessened my deadly mix of envy and jealousy. But boy was I jealous. I thought of joining contests but was too busy/lazy to make a move about it. I resigned to the idea that as long as I'll be able to see them play live, I'm okay for the rest of my life.

Weeks before the concert date, I started posting Incubus stuff on my Facebook wall, mostly YouTube videos. My form of release, I guess, from all the excitement. 

A day before the concert, PAGASA announced that a typhoon will hit Manila. I was like FUCK IT WHY NOW? The band was still in Singapore and there's no news if the concert will push through. 

July 28, 2011: Day of the concert. 

I heard from the news that the band has arrived. I was excited to go the office and finish all my work that day. On my way to Ortigas, I was really emotional. I never thought I could be this emotional over a band. I was really happy and excited that after the long wait, I'm gonna see them live. I'm gonna watch Brandon Boyd rape the stage. The guy I have been in love with since I was in grade school. I joked that I when I started crushing on him, I was an awkward "sando bra"-wearing kid, and until now, all grown up and shit, I still feel giddy whenever I hear his voice. I guess I'm not a fan of moving on. 

As much as I have wanted to leave the office early, I decided not to because I told myself that a concert of my favorite band was not a valid excuse for an early out. So yes, I stayed.

Around 2PM, Yaps, my officemate showed me this tweet from Odysseylive.net. A contest for a meet and greet with Incubus. All interested participants have to do is come to the Odyssey main office and bring the latest Incubus album, its receipt and the Incubus concert ticket. My officemates started urging me join but CRAP I DIDN'T HAVE THE ALBUM. I started breaking down. I cried because of the frustration. The Odyssey office is just a street away from my office but I couldn’t join because I didn't have the fucking album. Good thing my boss told me that I should go buy the album and come to the Odyssey office. At first I really didn't want to but they told me that I got nothing to lose. So hell yeah I went.

I rushed to Megamall to buy the album then headed so Strata 2000 for the contest. I arrived there out of breath because I was running the whole time. I almost broke down again when the people from Odyssey told me that I won because the whole time I was telling myself that I didn’t have a shot on winning this thing. I was the second one to come. Para akong nanalo sa lotto. Natupad na yung isa sa mga pangarap ko sa buhay, gaano man siya kababaw.

I started texting people that I'll be meeting Brandon Boyd and the rest of Incubus. I got funny replies. My sister's reaction was the funniest. She didn't believe me.

I went running back to the office and started crying again. It was too good to be true. What started to be an ordinary day ended up to be an extraordinary one. I just couldn't believe my luck.

THE MEET AND GREET

We were told to wait at the West gate of Araneta for the meet and greet. My co-winners and I waited for about an hour before they let us in. The security was tight and annoying. 

They dumped all the winners in a room with lots of mirrors, I don't know, maybe to remind us that we have to be really presentable before meeting the band.

I was on the second group, first in line.

My hand was trembling when I shook hands with Jose. I’m not saying that he’s a snob but he’s not as friendly as the four other members. Yes, he did smile but with less warmth.

Sitting next to Jose and the second member that I met was Ben Kenney. He’s kind of reserved and quiet, soft-spoken but really nice. He asked how I was doing and continued signing my album. Organizers allowed only one item to be signed. And no personal cameras were allowed.

Sitting in the middle was of course, Brandon Boyd. I was so nervous I started blabbing on how grateful I was that they came again and how long I’ve waited to see them live. He smiled and asked for my name so he can put it in his autograph. He wrote “Hi Joaz”. Before leaving, I asked if I could shake his hand again. Creep.

Next was Mike who like Ben asked how I was doing. Maybe they have a script, I don’t know. He was nice and child-like playing a mini-flute a fan gave him.

Probably the nicest one was Kilmore. He shook my hand, asked how I was doing and told me that he hopes I enjoy the concert. What a really nice dude.

After the signing, they told us that we have to stay behind the band for photos. I chose to stand behind Brandon, of course. I was staring at his back like an idiot, memorizing all the details that I can store inside my still shocked mind.

A trio of girls came and asked Brandon for a kiss. He gave them besos and I died of envy. When they left, I shamelessly called Brandon and asked if I could also kiss him. He said of course and turned his cheek on me (funny I can still remember this stuff, almost two weeks have passed), I then kissed him. Yes, not beso. Kissed him on his right cheek. Fuck besos.

After all the fans got their albums signed, the photo shoot started. I wasn’t able to smile out of nervousness. Loser.

Can’t post the photo here because of some copyright issues and I don’t wanna get sued.

Before leaving the band, I asked Brandon if I could hug him and as usual, he obliged. I wasn’t able to stop myself from uttering a very audible “oh my god” while hugging him. DOUBLE CREEP.

I was screaming after the meet and greet. Running and screaming with one of my co-winners on our way to the concert.

THE CONCERT

The concert didn’t start on time. My seat was shitty but my annoyance was easily overshadowed by the fact that I met the band. Everything was rainbows and unicorns that time.

Franco opened for the band and played four or five songs. I can’t really remember. I love them but I wanted to throw them out of Araneta because Incubus was the only band I wanted to watch live that night.

Franco’s set ended and the crowd went wild. Everyone was screaming, me included, except the fucking people sitting beside me. Boring farts. They didn't even try singing along to the songs. I was the only one singing my lungs out. Ugh. What were they doing there?

They played mostly old songs and fan favorites and inserted few new ones. Brandon Boyd’s voice was gold. GOLD. Plakado, tsong. No disappointments here. None.

Was really happy that they played 17 songs with 3 encores. Couldn't really ask for more.

The Aftermath

Still in cloud 9 until now -- the aftermath.